Confidence Has Nothing to Do with Feelings
Confidence has nothing to do with feelings.
Confidence has everything to do with fact.
Confidence comes from being sure that the person in the situation is able, and dependable to deliver up to expectations.
You will notice that three aspects are being pointed out here: ability (competence), dependability (character), expectation (standard).
When you know that someone has the character, and competence to deliver at the expected standard, you become confident that all will go well in the situation.
The facts you know in your mind, tell the emotions in your heart, to give you the feeling of rested assuredness (Confidence).
Conversely, when you know that the person in the situation does not have the character and or the competence to deliver to expected standard OR;
Do not know whether or not the person in the situation does or does not have the character and or the competence to deliver to expected standard;
Your mind tells your emotions to fear the worst, and you “lose confidence”.
So if confidence is rooted in facts rather than feelings, acquiring knowledge of the character, competence, and or delivery standards of the person in the situation, tells you whether or not to have “confidence” in the outcome you expect.
This implies that to have greater confidence in the expected outcome, you need to positively influence the improvement of character, competence, and or delivery standard of the person in the situation (and you know by now that you are the only person you can influence 100%).
1. Have faith in God (the more you know His ability, and dependability to deliver to expectations, the more confident you will feel about Him showing up for you)
2. Develop your character in prayer, and practical acts of building relationship and community with others (learn, and apply emotional intelligence to become effective at leading self, and others through situations) and you will increase your confidence in this
3. Build competence (acquire the knowledge, practice the skill, and repeatedly apply it to gain greater experience) and you will build confidence for a situation that requires that type of knowledge, skills, and experience
4. Challenge yourself to improve to the standard you need (yet give yourself grace to grow as you go) by practicing, and applying proven strategies, and techniques to improve and gain mastery
5. Keep doing 1-4, whether you feel like it or not; keep doing it even when progress seems slow; keep at it whether your efforts are celebrated or not; keep at it, even if previous attempts failed.
Like a muscle, confidence takes practice. You won’t build it laying around talking, or even learning about it. You will need to get up, step up, and actively build confidence!
It may “feel” impossible the first day, even worse the next, but you know the “facts”; the more you improve in character, competence, and performance standards, the more confidence you will also build in your ability, and dependability to deliver expected outcomes.
Remember, you are not doing this alone. God is there to help you, and you can always have confidence in Him.
“For it is [not your strength, but it is] God who is effectively at work in you, both to will and to work [that is, strengthening, energizing, and creating in you the longing and the ability to fulfill your purpose] for His good pleasure.”
Have an awesome week #P31Womanaire
Go get what’s yours!!!